Sex for a pregnant woman

The subject of sex is somewhat a taboo in the African Society. Talking about it during pregnancy becomes even harder, if not embarrassing. There are men who will not touch their wives the moment they announce ‘I am Pregnant*. But nine months is too long to go without sex for a married couple.

Sex can still be enjoyed in pregnancy, says Lillian Karanja, a midwife at Aga Khan University Hospital. Numerous couples worry that when the woman is pregnant the unborn baby may get endangered by the mother engaging in sexual intercourse. This results in them abstaining from sex. which should not be the case.

Sex, says Lillian, is like any other exercise, like walking or any other physical work out. Unless the doctor has requested that a couple abstains, then there is no reason to stop. An instance where a doctor will recommend non-practice is when the placenta is low and covering the birth canal. This can lead to bleeding or spotting during pregnancy.

Challenges for the woman—first trimester
In the first trimester, a pregnant woman may find it challenging to convince her mind that sex will be just like before. This is the time she is trying to figure out if It is right or wrong to have it. It is only understandable: there is a lot happening to her body-nausea accompanied by vomiting, breast inflammation, mood changes and probable low self esteem. At this time the expectant mother feels tired most of the time and just wants to sleep or lie down. All these changes may be a damper to any sexual feelings that arise.

Second trimester
Things become better from the third month. The woman is becoming more aware of her state and is even enjoying the pregnancy. She may be at ease having sexual Intercourse. The only thing to do is to adjust to positions that are comfortable for her. Remember her weight is now increasing.

Third trimester
Many couples fear having sex when they get to the third trimester. The pregnancy is now advanced and the baby has begun kicking. The woman appreciates the pregnancy more and is careful not to hurt her baby. This is when husbands fear that any sexual intercourse will endanger the pregnancy. Again, unless a doctor says so, there is no reason to abstain, only that just like with any other exercise, it should not be as vigorous.
It is also important to note that at this stage, there is decreased sexual drive for the woman. This may be brought about by backaches and the fact that she is heavier now. There are lots of painful cramps and pain in the lower part of the abdomen. Adopt comfortable positions that will put into consideration all these factors.

Sex induces labour
A major benefit of sex during pregnancy is the induction of labour. If the mother-to-be does not want to wait till her EDD, she may engage in sex, for during orgasm, the hormone oxytocin is produced. This hormone helps the uterus to contract and the woman can go into labour. Anytime after 38 weeks, the uterus will contract during orgasm, producing oxytocin. This will help her to go into labour.

After delivery, when is the right time to resume having sex?
This varies. Factors to be considered include the type of delivery the woman went through. Physically, the woman will bleed, lasting two to three weeks. After the bleeding stops it shows that all is well and mum is physically well as her uterus is back to normal. Once the bleeding stops, sexual activity can resume and if both are emotionally ready, a couple can go ahead and make love. Always remember to use the best positions. This, especially if the new mother went through a C-section, for the scar may still be sore. Consider non-penetrative sex at least for the first six weeks.

*See more on sex during pregnancy covered in Pregnant Issue 7 Pg 12 and Issue 1 Pg 10.

END: PG19/14