Are you ready for a baby?

Janet and Godfrey had been happily married for five years. But in all this time they had not had a child. Parents and friends were starting to worry that there would never be an addition in the family. There was speculation that one of them could be infertile. Many wondered why the couple did not consider adoption as an option. ‘We were not yet ready for a baby and it did not matter what opinion others had,’ Godfrey says. Finally, the couple was ready to have a child. What factors led them to determine the ‘right time’?

Financial status
Most parents-to-be want to create a comfortable home for their forthcoming child, not wanting them to lack, especially their basic needs. They would rather build their fortunes First, as a way of preparing to have children. Different couples have different ideas as to what building their fortune is. Some may decide to save up for the future education of children, or build a house, while for some it may just be establishing a firm foundation in their career.

Further education
Sometimes balancing school and motherhood may be difficult. A woman may decide to first immerse her attention in career development. This may take some time. This is particularly the case if she has agreed to support her husband with providing for the family as opposed to being a housewife.

Age
Is there really a right age to attain before parenthood? Dr Blasio Omuga says it could be between 18 to 35 years of age if all other conditions that a couple has set are favourable. Though late childbearing finds a mature mother, it could lead to complications for both the mother and the baby. The mother is prone to high blood pressure, miscarriage and gestational diabetes while the baby may have a low birth weight, or even Downs Syndrome.

Emotional readiness
What best describes your feelings and your spouse’s feelings towards the prospect of having a baby? Are there views of bringing up a child that you differ on? It is best for a couple to wait until they are mentally ready. This way. there is no reason to fret about the ability to raise the child properly. As a mother-to-be has concerns about the gravity of the life she is carrying, and raising up the child, her husband has his fears too. He is probably asking himself whether he is ready to be a daddy.

Will we make good parents?
The answer may not immediately surface, but if an agreement is in order and the priorities are right, chances are both will be excellent parents. At the same time if the man is given a say in when parenthood should start, he will be emotionally prepared to take charge But if one partner feels as if they are being pushed or pressured to have a baby, then there may arise arguments and constant fights. These could lead to resenting the baby.

BELOW ARE SIMPLE QUESTIONS THAT MAY HELP YOU CONCLUDE ON YOUR READINESS TO HAVING A BABY

You decided to have a baby when:

a)You were financially and emotionally stable
b)You turned thirty
c)You were pressured by parents

A pregnant woman is:
a)Beautiful
b)Natural
c)Fat

Your view of having a child is:

a)Being responsible for another life
b)Having someone to tell your stories to.
and carry on the family line
c)Having something of your own

Which best describes your feelings about having a child?
a)It will challenge and fulfill me in new ways
b)It will make my partner and family happy
c)I Just always assumed I would have kids

Will my partner and I make good parents?
a)True
b)Not sure
c)False

On religious matters, my partner and I:
a) Are in agreement as to the path the child will follow
b) Have not agreed which way to go
c) Are quiet about it

How much time do you currently spend with babies and children?
a) I work with kids and/or go out of my way to spend time with them
b)I enjoy seeing them on holidays and special occasions
c)I never see them except in malls or restaurants
If you have answered a) in most of your answers, you are definitely ready for an additional member in the family.

If you have b) in most of the answers, then you need to wait for a while and sort out the issues holding you back from going for the a) answers.

If option c) makes up most of your answers then you need more planning.

END: PG18/10