From the very day he went on bended knee and asked…”Will you…?” and I said… “Yes”, he has been the royal man I expected him to be. That’s my husband Duncan, the love of my life. And when our Troy was born, another love of my life appeared. I love them both. Like crazy!
I could NEVER put him to sleep… It took his Dad for him to close his eyes and fall asleep in his arms. I would watch him rock him as he sings (most of the times, the catholic song – “Nasadiki”). And both Troy and I would fall asleep to his singing! He would then bring him to me to put him to bed, Troy usually wakes up when his Dad puts him down- LOL! You see, unlike most mothers, my night shifts were amazing, we would wake up together, chat until baby feeds and falls back asleep. I do not recall a day I had to feel all alone in parenting, he is always present.
After 36 hours of labor…. Troy was born on 4th of November 2012, he got Pneumonia during birth, and we had a tough one week as we watched him fight it off in the hospital. The name Troy means “Strong” and that is all we know he will be. That week went by so slow, but God’s grace was sufficient enough and Troy recovered. Every milestone he has achieved since, has been a Blessing to us.
Our dear loving Son Troy is a charmer! Anyone who comes around him has a reason to smile, an effect that most babies have! I remember the first time he called his Dad.. “Pap!” He said, in a soft sounding voice that was too adorable. Troy changed our lives since he came home. I am now a Doctor, with a PHD in managing his fever and pain, I am also a student… at times I need to sit back and let him do his thing no matter how tempted I am to stop him from the random shouting and heartfelt laughter.
At the moment, Troy can say a few words, but I find it just God amazing how he understands everything we tell him! Shut the door, ‘Chum’ (kiss) mummy, come give me a hug, take this to the kitchen…. When a baby gets to this point, I can attest that there is a God in heaven who watches over babies and helps them understand. He is just simply adorable! The enthusiasm in this boy brings life to me every day! When our son is unwell, we do not fight over his medication (no matter how bitter or sweet it is). He sits down diligently and opens his mouth to have his medication. And once you are done, it’s his duty to return it to its box and take it to the kitchen so that it’s well-kept, I find this rather sweet. Troy knows and understands that mummy and daddy’s room is not his. He has to sleep in his bed. So when we are done catching up in the evening, Troy holds my hand and takes me to his room, pulls his hands up so that I can pick him up and put him to bed. A routine which we have nurtured with time, chums mum and picks his milk bottle to sleep.
Life changed, for the better the moment we knew we had a small being in the house who will learn from our actions and behaviors, we had to grow up a be parents! That is all that was expected of us. To show him love, so that he can always know that home is where he will always get all the love he needs, to ensure he is well mannered, when it calls for it, to whip him a bit, we do not shy away from it, this way, he will grow up to be accepted and respected in the society. We always say, we are his parents, his friends, his siblings (at least until he gets one), and for this, we value and love him with our all!!!
I admire my husband’s faith in God and pray day and night that my son will grow up to be just like him. How much he respects God and every Sunday, as hard as it is, he takes full responsibility to make sure we go to Church to give thanks. I am also amazed by how much love he has for us. He loves and loves with his all. I am reminded of a time, recently, when I hurt him so bad. We sat on the floor of the bedroom and all he kept promising me is his love for me. He never focuses on wrongs, but rather on how to make it right. And he does just that. Such little acts have changed my entire perspective of love, marriage and family. Since I met Duncan, I have come to appreciate the value of friendship and what it holds to be there for people and not expect much in return.”Tenda Mema, nenda zako” Duncan, was raised well and I can never trade him for anyone else. He is a Man amongst men…. I thank God and celebrate him forever! And even more so because of the family we are raising together.