Project Baby

My heart almost skips a beat on hearing Tom’s voice on the other end of the line. ‘Why are you using Meg’s phone, is she okay?’ I ask Tom as I sip my cup of coffee. It is the morning after the news of Megan’s HIV status and I am afraid she could have done something bad to herself.

‘I guess I left my phone in your house last night. We are on our way to have the test done on me. Would you kindly drop it to me at Megan’s doctor’s office?’

‘Sure, I will. It is on my way to the office, so there will be no inconvenience as such,’ I tell Tom, still blown by his commitment to Megan when most men would have by now run for their dear lives. He occupies the rest of my drive and my greatest wish is that he will remain as focused to this relationship as he is now even after they get the results. Also playing in my mind are different scenarios of his results. He could turn out positive or negative. I begin to imagine what lays ahead of Megan if Tom turns out negative. Will he still be by her side? Will they manage to have the baby they have always wanted? What if he is positive? What are the chances of them getting a HIV-free baby?

I get to the doctor’s office just as they are getting in the consultation room and all we manage are pleasantries. I give Tom his phone and they promise to keep me updated on the progress. I notice that Meg’s eyes are red and swollen and I conclude she has been crying the whole night. Tom’s grip on her hand is firmer than usual and although he looks a little bit pensive, he seems to be in control of his emotions and fears, if he has any.

‘Let us talk later guys,’ I say as I leave, imagining myself going through what Megan is undergoing right now. I don’t know how I can handle it. I quickly banish the thought in my subconscious and proceed to the office.

I love my current office. The working hours are so flexible and as long as you deliver your targets, nobody bothers with you. It is half past nine and Noella watches me walk in. She sits just next to me at the corner of the office.

‘You took off yesterday like you were going to put out fire in your apartment and now you are dragging your weight like you spent the whole night digging. Is everything okay?’ She asks. ‘I am fine Miss Observer. I just have a lot in my mind. Nothing to worry you though,’ I assure her. She is the only workmate I can call a friend. But I will not discuss Megan with her.

The clock seems to be at standstill because time is not moving. I keep staring at my cell phone for any text message from Megan or Tom and I keep picking my extension at the first ring. As much as I try to concentrate on the bulk of work in my in-tray, all I keep seeing are Megan’s HIV results. I manage to focus myself after the tea break and quickly immerse myself in work. Lunch time finds me still busy and I request Noella to bring me some fruits as she comes from her lunch break. I have a lot of work to sort out, so I will not afford a break.

It is four o’clock now and I have neither touched my fruits nor have I heard from Megan or Tom. I am not sure what to think anymore. Did they decide to drive down to Mombasa and drown themselves in the ocean? Surely, results don’t take this long to come out.

I am tempted to call them but I decide against it. They are my friends and if they want me to be part of this, I will be patient until when they are ready. I head to the kitchen to prepare my fruits and just when I am taking in the last bite, my mobile phone indicates a message coming in. It is from Megan and I can’t understand a thing.

‘We are discordant,’ it read.

I do not want to sound silly by texting back and asking what being discordant is; so I do a quick Google search. ‘Oh my .. .’ We are girls and we share the most intimate of stories. So, I know Meg and Tom have been intimate with each other. How is it that he is free of HIV? My mind wanders to farthest of imaginations. The best that seems to console me is that maybe Megan’s results were false.

‘Yes! That is it.’ I am suddenly happy. I will just call her and tell her to repeat her test, with a different doctor. No. I will pass by her house and personally take her to repeat the tests elsewhere. The last hour flies off and it’s now five o’clock. I quickly clear my desk and I am ready to leave. I pass by Noella’s desk and she wonders why I am humming ‘Oh happy day.’ I tell her that I am on my way to make a friend happy.

I pull up at Megan’s like a mad woman and rush to her apartment. Tom opens the door for me and I am grinning. I tell Megan to pick her bag because we are going to repeat her test.

‘The one you did yesterday could be false,’ I tell her. She does not bulge from her coital position and Tom points me to the side table. Ten results from 10 different places. Three from Voluntary Counselling and Testing (VCT) centres, five from different gynaecologists and two from general physicians. The results are the same. Megan is HIV-positive and Tom is HIV- negative!

‘Excuse me, please.’ I make my way to the bathroom and throw up. I am in denial. The only hope that I had for my best friend has been dashed. She is indeed infected. And her fiancée is not. I don’t even know what to think any more. I slowly make my way to the sitting room and walk up to her. I open my arms but she is too weak to even stand. I nevertheless go down and tell her it will be well.

END: BL 43/34-35